Friday, May 15, 2015

Random Acts of Shifeness


  • We met with the new trainer to work with Tank Tank and so far so good. She thinks Tank is stressed out because our home has a lot of high-energy thanks to Kyle and Hayden so we need to help him relax by letting him have some quiet time. When things get a little hectic, we will give him one of his favorite bones and let him hang out in our bedroom. There are a few other things we need to do but right now that's where we are at.
  • I was listening to a podcast where they were discussing their top 10 movies of 2014 and it dawned on me that I don't even think I saw 10 movies in 2014. 
  • Have you been to Prince Edward Island? Well it looks like it got a rise out of this guy. You might have to click on the photo to see it but it appears that the man on the cover of this travel brochure has a boner. Read all about it here. I guess if your trip to the beach lasts longer than 4 hours then you should contact a physician. 

  • Another one of my favorite shows is coming to an end. Bye bye to "Mad Men." I'm really looking forward to the finale but will miss not having Don Draper around. 
  • How about a silly joke?  Three ducks walk into a bar.The first duck walks up to the bar and the bartender asks, "What's your name, what's your drink, and how was your day?" The first duck replies, "My name is Bill, I'll have a rye and coke, and I had a GREAT day! I was in and out of puddles all day! Splashing around, gettin' wet, having fun!" The second duck walks in. The bartender asks the duck, "What's your name, what's your drink, and how was your day?"The duck says, "My name's Joe, I'll have a gin and tonic, and I had a GREAT day! I was in and out of puddles all day! Splashing around, getting wet, having fun!" The third duck walks into the bar, the barkeeper asks him, "What's your name, what's your drink, and how was your day?" The duck looks him dead in the eyes and replies, "My name is Puddles, I'll have three shots of tequila, and I don't want to talk about my day."
  • What are you doing for the Memorial Day weekend? We are taking both of the kiddos to a wedding. Should be interesting. Wish us luck. 
  • Speaking of Memorial Day, we have a lot going on besides the wedding so I will not be blogging next week. 
  • See ya in two weeks. Have a good one and thanks for stopping by. 




I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream. 

Friday, May 08, 2015

I've Been Better Part 2

On Tuesday evening, Mrs. Shife made our decision that we needed to find Tank a new home, and we started asking friends and family if they were interested in a middle-aged basset with some baggage. I was seconds away from posting the below message on Facebook:

It's with a heavy heart that I share this news.
We have to find Tank a new home.
He bit Kyle last week, and this is third time this has happened.
I don't trust him around the kids anymore and I'm afraid the next bite is going to cause serious damage to Kyle or Hayden. Plus, it could possibly lead us to having to put Tank down.
We have talked to our vet, two trainers and our friends at the Utah Friends of Basset Hounds to figure out the best scenario for Tank dog.
Selfishly I want to keep him because I've grown quite fond of the fat basset but it's just not the right environment for him.
He needs to be in a home without kids, and where he can be the center of attention.
I feel like I'm giving up on him and a failure, but in the end I know this is the right thing to do even though it's going to be hard letting him go.
Doing the right thing sucks.
He truly is a great dog but just needs to be in a place where he can be spoiled rotten. He just needs a loving home.
If you know of anyone that might be interested in a 6-year-old basset hound, please let me know. I would love to keep in the Boise area so I could come over and say hi every now and then.
Otherwise, he's going back to Utah this weekend.
Thanks for reading.

Then I got a phone call.
It was a highly recommended trainer that our vet told us about.
I spoke to her for about an hour.
I even made it through the conversation without crying.
After she heard it all, she thought Tank, as well as the Shifley family, could be trained so we can be one happy family.
It's not going to be easy but she feels we are his best chance and no one is going to love him like we do so we are going to give it a shot.
 We also have to treat him like a dog and not like the middle child because as it turns out, he is a dog. Wish us luck and thank you for your support.
It has been an emotional roller coaster the last 10 days but hopefully we can make this work so this is Tank dog's forever home.


At least one of them was excited about the news. 





I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.

Friday, May 01, 2015

I've Been Better



That definition of crestfallen or any of those synonyms pretty much sums up my emotions since Wednesday afternoon.
I don't want to get into too many details at this moment because the situation is still fluid, but it's a high possibility that we will have to find Tank a new home.
It's breaking my heart because I've grown quite fond of the fat basset.
I apologize for being so vague but we need to take care of a few things before I want to share everything that's going on with Tank Tank.
We need to talk to the vet to rule out any medical problems, then we need to get an assessment from a dog trainer.
After that, Mrs. Shife and I will try to figure out what makes sense for Tank and the Shifleys.
I'm fighting for him like crazy and I'm not giving up on him, but sometimes that's not enough.
I'll let you know how things go next week.
Take care, thanks for stopping by and talk to you soon.

One of my favorite pictures of Tanklin. 


I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.

Friday, April 24, 2015

Well That Was Even Faster

I had big plans to talk about the anniversary of my birth today because it turns out today is my birthday. But then there was another big milestone in the Shifley household, and I thought this would be way more fun to share than me complaining about how old I am.
I figure I can complain about how old I am next week.
So what's up, you ask?
Well Little Miss Hayden continues to blow my freakin' mind.
She can now also ride a bike.
Yes you read that correctly.
I know.
It's crazy.
She will not be 3 1/2 until next month and I now she's not the first 3-year-old to learn how to ride a bike but I was just not expecting it from my child.
Remember I'm the dude who refers to himself as a dumb, white guy.
Evidently she got more of Mrs. Shife's DNA.
Enjoy the videos and enjoy your weekend.
Thanks for stopping by.







I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.











Friday, April 17, 2015

Roseburg On My Mind


Which is quite disturbing because I believe that small town in Oregon would definitely make the top 3 of my least favorite places I have lived.
I should also say that this recollection is neither interesting or funny.
Now that I have lured you in with those statements, let the fun begin.
Here's a horrible picture of a map to give you an idea of where this place exists.


Isn't it lovely?
I lived there about 6 months and by my estimations that was 149 days too long.
The first day was OK but it was all downhill from there.
It was my first job after college working as a sports reporter.
It wasn't a good fit.
I missed my friends, I missed Idaho but mostly I missed Mrs. Shife.
I tried to make it work but ... spoiler alert ... it didn't.
It was definitely them and not me.
The final straw was when I locked my keys in my truck.
I had to walk about 3 miles back to my apartment to get my spare key.
I said "This town can eat a bag of dicks"every single step of the way.
By the way, you can order a bag of dicks in case you were interested.
I was not happy.
I just felt if I was back home in Idaho this wouldn't have happened.
Sure I could've locked my keys in the car but I would have been able to call a friend to help me out.
I was looking for a reason and that was a good enough one for me.
But when I was making that 6 mile round trip I realized something else.
I should have gotten an engineering degree.
Kidding.
But I did have a serious thought.
I should have known better after my first experience with Roseburg.
Before I got the job, I had to interview for the job so there I was in this small town in Central Oregon in a small hotel room wandering what I was going to do with my life.
I was also preparing for the interview.
And by preparing I mean drinking beer and watching "Point Break."
I realized as I was getting my stuff together for the interview the next day that I forgotten my dress socks so I headed over to the mall to remedy that problem.
I went into a department store and asked a female employee for help with some dress socks.
She asked me what color.
I assumed some variation of khaki to go with my khaki pants because I thought your socks should match your pants but then I thought to myself, "What do I know. I'm a dip shit. Maybe this town is a fashion mecca."
So I just told her that I needed socks that matched khaki pants.
She suggested white socks.

I couldn't find a pic of khaki pants with white socks but you get the idea.

I have never been accused of being a fashion maven but I know a thing or two, and one of those things is wearing white socks with my khaki pants is going to look kind of stupid.
I went with the socks that matched my pants and I got the job.
Well there it is.
The reason I moved to Roseburg and the reason why I finally left.
Now if I could just figure out why I have Roseburg on my mind lately.
Maybe it's because I just locked my keys in our car.
Have a good weekend.



I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.



Friday, April 10, 2015

Well That Was Fast

No it's not a "that's what she said" joke.
Well I guess we could go there but I have much more important things to discuss.
Do you remember last week when I said Kyle was going to start learning how to ride his bike without training wheels? We spent about 15 minutes on Saturday and Sunday practicing, then this happened:




Off he went.
Props to this nice lady for showing me how to get it done. The Internet is full of some useful stuff.
I thought it was going to take a long time and a lot of frustration but Kyle Bunga was awesome.
Now he wants to ride his bike every day after school.
My advice is to avoid training wheels and start them on balance bikes or just take the pedals off their bikes until they figure out their balance. It looks like it will not be too long before Little Miss Hayden will be needing a bike of her own as she has taken to her balance bike quite naturally.


Have a great weekend.
Thanks for stopping by.



I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream. 

Friday, April 03, 2015

Random Acts of Shifeness

  • Words of wisdom from Mitch Hedberg: An escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. You would never see an "Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order" sign, just "Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience. We apologize for the fact that you can still get up there."
  • Kyle got a big boy bike for a birthday present so now I have to help him learn to ride it. Wish us luck as we are going to need it. 
  • With some of the ridiculous laws being passed around this nation of ours (Indiana and Arkansas), I found this quote to be a good one this week: "We can easily forgive a child who's afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light." – Plato
  • Afghanistan veterans now hunt poachers in Africa. I'm glad they are doing this but I wished we lived in a world where we treated animals with more dignity, kindness and respect. 
  • Looking forward to Game of Thrones and Mad Men being back on the air.
  • I think this might be the last year I play a lot of softball. I know Mrs. Shife is reading this and saying "Whatever" to herself because I have made that declaration before. But with the kiddos and work, I don't have a lot of free time and I don't know if playing softball 2-3 times a week is the best use of that free time. 
  • It didn't always used to be this way but when the calendar turns to April, I get a little blue. Mostly because my mom's birthday is April 5, and even though she passed away in 2008, I still miss her tremendously. I don't know if time does heal all wounds. Maybe it takes the edge off so it's not so painful but I just think some wounds are never, ever going to go away.  
  • Here's a picture of the middle child. Tank hasn't made an appearance on the blog in a little bit so here's the most handsomest hound I know.

  • Happy Easter! Hope you and your favorite somebunnies have a great day. 



I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.