How do I describe this blog?
A line from "Old School" with a minor tweak.
"My friends, this is a safe place. A place where we can feel free sharing our feelings. Think of my blog as a nest in a tree of trust and understanding. We can say anything here."
Friday, September 01, 2017
Revisiting Labor Day 2006
Looking back on an old Labor Day post and boy, oh, boy how times have changed.
No kiddos. We had a life before Kyle and Hayden?
I used the word "so" a lot. Is that good or bad or who cares?
A portable DVD player. Do they even make these anymore?
I was wearing underwear. What? When did that happen?
I updated it with some awesome GIFs and I apologize for the lack of originality this week but I am just starting to feel like myself after a difficult week adjusting to new anxiety meds. More on that some other day. Thanks for stopping by. Have a wonderful Labor Day weekend. Talk soon.
Well I have been meaning to share this story for a little
bit now, but a little thing called work has kept getting in the way. For the
Labor Day weekend, Mrs. Shife and I went to her parent's house over the long
weekend. It is roughly a little more than six hours. We hit the road after work
and were on our way. Mrs. Shife drove, and I enjoyed some fabulous cinematic
adventures on my portable DVD player.
Well as the miles started to rack up
something strange started to manifest itself in my pants. I am not sure if it
was because I was sitting in the same position for hours or if there was sudden
change in cabin pressure or if I had a dormant case of crotch rot that only
surfaced in eastern Oregon or if I just suffered from itchy butt syndrome.
Whatever the heck was going on in the Fruit of the Loom kingdom is still a
mystery but somebody was going to get hurt if there was not a resolution to
So I was faced with a bit of dilemma: Do I ask my lovely wife to
pull over so I can further investigate to see if I am smuggling carpenter ants
in my pants or do I just take matters into my own hands?
Mrs. Shife's reaction looked a lot like the following GIFs so that might
give you an idea of what I decided to do.
I pulled down my shorts, grabbed my
underwear, and started pulling. It is amazing how easily those cotton nut
huggers fall to pieces when you pull hard enough.
I yanked, tugged, heaved,
ripped, jerked, wrenched, cried, etc. and after about 10 minutes the only thing
left was an elastic waistband.
I could have easily said, "Mrs. Shife can
you please pull over. I am experiencing some mild discomfort south of the
But since I am stubborn man, I decided I would rather
pluck those panties off right then and there in the thriving metropolis that is
Milton-Freewater while we were cruising at a speed of 70 miles per hour.
am down one pair of skivvies, but the joy I felt after being released from my
undergarments was almost indescribable.
There you go; the highlight of my
Labor Day weekend, but please do not shed any tears for the shredded Hanes
because those undies died an honorable death. I do believe that my violent
behavior towards my intimate apparel makes me ineligible to be an underwear
model, but damn it, the truth had to be told to prevent this from happening to
another innocent victim. Yes, it is true, underwear are not always fun to wear.
I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.