Mr. Shife's April Antics 2016 - Day 15

It’s a good thing that I decided to get my hearing fixed because my good ear isn’t as good as it once was. I was waiting for a conference call to begin with some co-workers and a few of them were discussing a music festival that had just concluded called TreeFort. 
Besides being a music festival, TreeFort has other venues like ComedyFort, FilmFort and FoodFort.
The festival allows anyone to host a venue.
You fill out some paperwork and, voila, you are holding an event at TreeFort.
For example, next year I could have ShifeFort at TreeFort.
Yes, you are invited.
I was aware of this and that’s why when I heard what I am about to describe to you it seemed somewhat plausible in my head.
My co-worker was describing how AleFort was just a mess.
However, when he first said ale, I heard anal.

They don’t sound that similar, but this is just one week after I had my ear surgery and I still felt a little weird.
And in my head, I thought I had just heard the words, “AnalFort was just a mess.”
But he said AleFort and he continued to discuss why AleFort was disgusting to everyone in the room.
Again, in my head, I’m hearing why AnalFort was disgusting.
I didn’t want to be rude, but I just wanted to blurt out “Are you kidding me? No shit AnalFort would be disgusting! What did you think it was going to be like?”
Thinking about the smells, the scenes, the noises and people doing AnalFort stuff, and the adjective disgusting is definitely one that would pop into my head.
Adding to my confusion was how my other co-workers were listening to how disgusting it was like it was no big deal and AnalForts were a pretty common thing.
My co-worker was mentioning words like slippery, messy, long lines, not enough cups, not enough instructions, etc, and I was about to lose my mind.
Fortunately, the conference call began before I descended into madness, but I was still trying to wrap my head around AnalFort during most of the call and figure out what was happening to the place I called home.
If anal is your thing then go for it, but I just figured this is something folks did in the privacy of their own domicile and there were not dedicated venues at music festivals for anal forting especially in Boise, Idaho. 
The conference call ended and we all headed out, but I pulled my co-worker aside to ask what the hell was going on.
“Dude, seriously, they had an AnalFort at TreeFort?”
He looked at me like you would look at someone if they just said the words AnalFort to you.
“Yes. AnalFort.”
“I said AleFort.”
“Oh. That kinda changes things.”
"Just a little bit." 

And then I walked back to my desk laughing at what I thought I had heard, but also a little concerned that I knew that I had 60 minutes of AnalFort imagery that needed to be removed from my hard drive.


I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream. 


  1. That was the best story to start a weekend!!

  2. I used to have similar problems before cataract surgery. (Yes I had my cataracts early in life, just to get them over with.) The very first one and actually the only one I remember was "chicken butts" in the freezer at the grocery story. I had to read it a few times before I realized it was "chicken parts". Which is bad enough, I guess. But better than chicken butts.

  3. OMG.... still laughing. Am I glad I popped (POPPED) in here today.

    Have a great weekend.

  4. That's quite a misunderstanding. When the page loaded and I saw the Bill and Ted gif, I was thinking you were as happy as I was that they're making a third one.

  5. This would be fodder for a situation comedy.

  6. my chair is getting quite uncomforable thinking about one of the forts. congrats on the ear surgery. after things have settled down listen to misty by stan getz and dave brubeck at a very low level. it should be a good quality control test.


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