Friday, February 19, 2016

Random Acts of Shifeness: Operation Cowboy Up

  • Nothing like getting an old tearjerker to invade your earbuds while you are at the gym trying to be manly like lift weights. I was listening to Spotify's weekly recommended playlist and a blast from the past came on that about had me bawling in the weight room. I had to bite the lip a few times to keep it together but it was close.
  • I suppose you want to know the song, right? It's kind of embarrassing because it doesn't really hold up through the ages, but it still grabs me as it takes me back to a place I look back upon fondly. Watching the video for the song for the first time with my mom at home on the couch after I got home from school and we were both a ball of mush after the video was done. The song was called "Feed Jake" by The Pirates of the Mississippi. 
  • Maybe I am a little emotional because I got told to suck it by my insurance company regarding my ear surgery. Anybody out there need a lot of good karma and doesn't mind parting with $10,000? It will be fine and it will happen, but just not as soon as I want it to. We just need to cowboy up and work on a plan. 
  • I am also a little conflicted about the procedure because once it's done, it's done. What if I don't like it? What if my quality of life doesn't improve? I called the doctor's office and I am going to hopefully talk to someone that has had the procedure done that might be able to answer some of those questions. The doctors and nurses do their best, but they haven't had their hearing restored after 40-something years and I think it will help me out if I can talk to a person that's been in my shoes. 
  • I am further conflicted because if it was the kids or Mrs. Shife that needed this, I would do it in a heartbeat. I don't know why I am struggling with it. Low self-worth as if I don't deserve it. Thank you Catholic guilt. 
  • My wife and kids have my heart but somedays I feel like the devil has my soul. What I mean by that is I have a beautiful, amazing wife who for reasons beyond my comprehension thinks I'm a cool dude and I have 2 beautiful, amazing children who think I'm a good daddy, but the devil on my shoulder just chirps in my ear telling me to focus on nothing but the negative things that I do. I don't see what they see in me. I know I am that person, but again I just don't feel like I deserve it. 
  • Well we certainly don't want to end the blog on that low note. Here's a video and a few pictures from our adventures last weekend up at a cabin we rented in Donnelly, ID. If you are missing snow in you area, I know where it is. Donnelly. For the love of fat bassets they had a lot. 
  • Speaking of fat bassets, he's not a big fan of sledding. I tried to get him to join me and he didn't think that was a great idea. I don't know if you can hear it but as I'm sliding away I say "You are not man's best friend," and I think he barked at me something "Well then don't take me sledding you dick." 

Kyle is looking pretty good on top of his mountain. 

 Mrs. Shife and I really need to take a selfie class. 


And then there's Hayden. She's just adorable. 
And special points if you have any idea what cartoon her hat is from? 







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Thanks for stopping by. Talk to you soon and take care. 








I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream. 

7 comments:

Jon said...

I'm sorry that the insurance company is being the way they are. I can understand a lot of the feelings you're expressing, as I go through those myself, and more often than I would like to. Maybe it's just because we're tremendously lucky with the people who surround us. It will get better and things will work out for the best. Hang in there.

Stephen Hayes said...

I have no doubt that you're the good person your wife and kids think you are. Most people don't love themselves, and it's hard to feel good about yourself if you're your own worst enemy. Take care, and be good to yourself.

the dogs' mother said...

Angry Birds? Looks like the snow was a good time had by all.

Valerie said...

What can I say? I could start with something like 'it's all in your imagination' .... 'you have a great wife and kids and they love you AS YOU ARE ... but I guess in your present mood you won't agree with me. Trust me on this, though, it will all pass and everything will turn out good. Okay? Now smile and think how much better off you are than me ((Matt))

Allison said...

Have you tried contacting your state's insurance commissioner? This just doesn't seem right that they can deny this. You're deaf in the ear, it can be fixed. This is why we have insurance.
I don't know anyone with the implant, but my husband just got hearing aids. It's an adjustment, and sometimes he misses his quiet world. They come out at the gym, too raucous. Can you turn an implant off?
Good luck with this.

kden said...

So unfortunate about your insurance company. And I know all too well and the self worth issues. Take your cues from them and know you deserve it, and them :) Great video, I remember when Nellie used to run with us in the snow.

E. Rosewater said...

channel your inner stuart smalley. you deserve good things and you deserve your share of happiness.

the sooner you get your ear fixed the lower your cost per day for good hearing.