Sunday, March 10, 2013

Mr. Shife's March Madness - Day 10

Kyle is potty trained, and he has been for a long time. However, every now and then he will do some stuff that makes me wonder if he needs to go back to potty training boot camp. Lately he has been saying "I gotta poop" then sprints to the bathroom but his time to toilet is greatly diminished because he has one hand on his butt trying to keep the poop in and the other hand clearing a hole through the hallway so he can make it on time to take care of business. So naturally this is leading to complications like streak marks in his undies. I was getting a little upset about it and wanted to tell Kyle to quit messing around and just go poop when you feel it popping its head out like a turtle. I have told him that once poop makes up its mind that it wants to be out then there is not much you can do about it because it is happening. And yes - in case you were wondering - I never imagined I would be having a conversation about poop and gravity with a 3-year-old. Then I had a poop epiphany. Kyle is only 3 and for the most part gets all of his poop in the toilet with no racing stripes. If I had to make an educated guess, I would give him an average of around .750. Well I am in my early 40s and I am not even batting 1.000 when it comes to clean undies. Every now and then, the old master Mr. Shife gets a visit from the skid mark wizard. So all in all the little man is doing pretty good and as Forrest Gump wisely said, "It happens."



Kyle just being Kyle. 




I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream. 

8 comments:

billy pilgrim said...

i think kyle should watch john from cincinatti and take some tips from butchie yost.

professional poopers always wear very dark underwear.

Mr. Shife said...

I will have to look up Butchie Yost, BP, and you are right about dark underwear. After you hit about 18 it is dark skivvies forever.

kylie said...

gawd, you will probably hate me for taking a light hearted post seriously but he just might have better control all around if he sees a chiro!

and if you think that was a weird convo, try coaching a 15 year old thru the door on how to use an enema.

or have i said that before?

Red said...

"a poop epiphany" or as some would say, a poopiphany. Go Kyle go! No really, go! LOL Dear Kyle, Here's wishing you less streaked drawers and more "I'm a big kid now" moments ;-D and remember, Dad's still got a long way to go #seewhatIdidthere

kden said...

When my daughter was trained, or so I thought, she did a full out poo in the pants because the clip-on fan we had in the bathroom looked like a monster. What the Hell? Try explaining that it is NOT a monster and it is NOT acceptable to poop in your pants. Sure don't miss those days :-)

Valerie said...

You're right, Kyle is only 3. Boys get lazy around that age. It happens, but not all the time. Quit worrying until it gets to be 100%. It's fun being a a parent, isn't it?

Kenneth Noisewater said...

You win some, you lose some. You crap yourself sometimes, you make it to the can the next time. Kyle's a tough kid. He'll get back on that pot the next time.

Instead of shitting down the side of his leg like the Chicago Bulls . ..

Jon said...

Yeah, we're still working on that one too.