Creature Report

What am I going to share with you today?
Boy meets girl?
Good versus evil?
An unlikely hero rises to save the day?
Does beer taste good?
How about a dumb, white guy being brought to tears by a British-American children's television series?
If you spend quality time with a little person between the ages of 2 and 4 then you might be familiar with the cartoon "The Octonauts." If you indeed have had the pleasure of watching Captain Barnacles and his crew's mighty undersea adventures then no need to watch the video. But for those who have not seen these delightful and stylized anthropomorphic animals, then please watch the video so you can hopefully enjoy and understand my story.

Kyle discovered "The Octonauts" a little bit ago, and it has become one of his new favorites. Well after the Octonauts complete an adventure, they get together to have a creature report but you know that already because you just watched the video.
The creature report song is catchy and it definitely gets stuck in your head if the cartoon is on a few times a day which happens at the Shifley household. Now that creature report has been established. Let me also establish that my wife is funny. Sometimes she is extremely funny.
So we are established.
On with the story.
I am waiting for Mrs. Shife to join me in the living room so we can watch one of our TV shows before calling it a night. As she is putting the kids to bed, I am trying to solve the mystery of the day. What the hell did I eat? Because whatever I put into my body was not happy and was expressing its disapproval with some paint peeling, stomach churning, underwear melting, dry heaving, hair removing, mind numbing farts. Fortunately for me, the air had cleared by the time Mrs. Shife had entered the living room but I warned her that her nose was at risk if she sat by me on the couch. She shrugged off my advisory and we started watching our show. A few minutes later Mrs. Shife jumped off the couch like her pants were on fire but it was just her nostrils. As she staggered away from the deathly green fog, she started laughing as she did her best imitation of the Octonauts and started singing "Creature report. Creature report."
We both laughed. A lot.
And that is the tale of how a dumb, white guy was being brought to tears by a British-American children's television series.
Have a wonderful weekend.

P.S. Halloween update. Sorry no cute pictures of Kyle and Hayden all dressed up. They were up at Grandma and Grandpa's house and not a lot of trick-or-treating at the farm. We did buy Kyle a Spider-Man costume, and asked him if he wanted to get dressed up but he told us that "I just want to be Kyle."  

I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.


  1. Yes. Yes, I have seen that. And it's creepy how the little kids entertainment becomes so prevalent in our lives that we recite it too. I'm still walking around the office singing
    Blue's Clues songs.

  2. This is a heartwarming arse warming tale. I have enjoyed the whole creature report. Made me laugh.I have no one here to laugh at farts, so it is helpful that being a true gentleman, I never break wind from that area.

  3. You two crack me up! And I love Kyles comment, he sounds like such as easy going kid with his mom's sense of humor. Thanks for your kind words about my trip. I promise that's my last post about it ;-)

  4. Don't be ashamed. I cried a little when Starscream got waxed by Galvatron in Transformers the animated movie.

  5. You've got me wanting to see more kids videos. Oooooh it takes me back!

    Agreed, Mrs Shife is soooo humorous. Hope the farts are less potent now... grins.

    "I just want to be Kyle." Isn't that a gem of a comment. Good on you, Kyle.

    Have a great weekend, all of you.

  6. is kyle too young for south park's take on honey boo boo?

  7. I love that he just wanted to be Kyle.
    Your wife is perfect for you!

  8. Never heard of this show must be a good one ;) Speaking of boy meets world did you hear they are making the new show girl meets world? Ya I am stoked

    Thanks for picking with me they are up now


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