Monday, November 07, 2011

OT: Day 1

I am going with OT for overtime.
We also considered Occupy Mrs. Shife's Belly: Day 281.
Since we got signed up for the bonus part of the pregnancy, I thought I would share some quotes that my wife might or might not find amusing.

"Being pregnant is an occupational hazard of being a wife." ~ Queen Victoria

"By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant." ~ Phyllis Diller

"Childbirth classes neglect to teach one critical skill: How to breathe, count, and swear all at the same time." ~ Linda Filterman

"Have you ever tried getting out of your car through the exhaust pipe?" ~ Murphy Brown

"Having a baby is like taking your bottom lip and pulling it over your head". ~ Carol Burnett

"If men bore children, there would only be one born in each family." ~ Unknown

"If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternately, there would never be more than three in a family." ~ Lawrence Housman

"If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters." ~ Nora Ephron

"Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside." ~ Rita Rudner

"Pregnancy The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." ~ Rajneesh

"Prepared childbirth is a contradiction in terms." ~ Joyce Armor

"There is a reason God makes you pee every 2 hours those last 3 months, it's training for the every 2-4 hour feedings." ~ Unknown

"Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes." ~ Joyce Armor

"You can sort of be married, you can sort of be divorced, you can sort of be living together, but you can't sort of have a baby." ~ David Shire

"You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment." ~ Dave Barry



I will persevere. I will keep moving forward. I will be the stream.


8 comments:

Jon said...

"Overtime" works. Not to make her worry, but I was two weeks late, and they still had to induce. We'll be hoping for this all to end/begin soon.

kden said...

I like OT, but I'm sure she doesn't. Those sayings are great, love Phyllis Diller's. And so true what unknown said.

Travis Erwin said...

Enjoy the ride.

silly rabbit said...

I think OT is perfect. From now on it's just a matter of making a score... any minute.
My favorite pregnancy line is "Never block a pregnant woman on the way to the bathroom."
Great quotes!

Valerie said...

OT? Oh damn! I expected to read otherwise today. Fingers crossed the OT doesn't go on for long.

Posh Totty said...

Loving those quotes, but then I would, Im not pregnant lol.

texlahoma said...

Called up the Doctor, the Doctor said
"That's what you get for jumping on the bed!"

Red said...

Five Woots each for quoting Diller and Burnett ;-)