Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Let's Try This Again

So filling in the blanks was not so much fun. It actually did turn out to be the opposite of fun. Man I should get into the psychic business. Have you read my theory on psychics? Well today is your lucky day because here it comes: You can be my psychic after you win the lottery. But you probably already knew that since you are psychic so go ahead and send me an email. I have a few questions I need answered.
Anyway thanks to those who participated. I feel like Lex Luthor. Speaking of good old Lex, if you are reading this blog here is a tip for you. If I were you, I'd would just send Superman a bunch of gift certificates to Taco Bell and let the magic of this fast food empire do the work for you. Never underestimate the power of explosive diarrhea.
Oh, here is another tip that is for everyone: If you have to pick up a friend at the airport during rush hour. An 'anonymous tip' should allow you to pick them up at the TSA and avoid the terminals.
OK I guess I am going to have to come up with something original.
Dang it. Ooops. I mean yipeee and super duper and I am so happy I am going to crap out rainbows and piss sunshine. Wow. That sounded not nice. I need to go visit a pesticide service and get the crabs removed from my derriere. Check it out, I spelled derriere correctly on the first time. At least I got that going for me.
Does eating at a T.G.I. Fridays on a Wednesday tastes like lies? Wow. I am all over the place today. Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue. Well I guess I should get back on task and explain to you beloved readers what I need help with so here it goes ...

I need your suggestions. Baby Shife will be turning 1-year-old next month and I would love to hear from all of you on what you think a little man would like for a present. Mrs. Shife and I have some ideas but it doesn't hurt to have input from other folks who have been down this road. And to help with your creativity, here is one of my favorite pictures of him. He seems to be pretty proud of the fact that he just polished off a rice cracker - and the fat basset didn't get any of it. Maybe next time fat basset.

29 comments:

WomanHonorThyself said...

g'morning! too early to think..ha having comp probs with sum major viruses..UGH!...will drop by latah gator!..hugs!

Mr. Shife said...

Good morning and good luck in your battle. Hope it goes in your favor.

blamemyrobot said...

Yes you are all over the place but 10 points for the Airplane reference. Nice one!

Also, not sure if I could help with this. I'm horrible with kids. Maybe you get him a celebratory cigar?! Wait is that socially responsible and appropriate? I dunno... see I'm horrible with kids.

Mr. Shife said...

Thank you blamemyrobot for the suggestion. I will pass it along to the party planning committee. I hope the airplane tip comes in handy. And how many points do I need before I get a free trip?

Random Chick said...

At one year-old most kids will just love ripping open a present and play with the wrapping. But here is a GREAT toy my kids absolutely LOVED. The Hasbro Playskool Busy Ball Popper.

Baby Shife will enjoy hours of fun! I'm serious!

Loved your random-ness in this post. ;-)

billy pilgrim said...

i think baby shife already has everything a 1 year old would want.

how about a little sister?

Mr. Shife said...

I figured I should just unleash the randomness today. A purge if you will. And thank you for your very fine suggestion RC. I have seen that gadget at Toys R Us. I will add it to the list.

Mr. Shife said...

We are thinking about it Billy, but I don't believe a baby sister would arrive in time for Baby Shife's birthday party. I am good but not that good.

texlahoma said...

My grandson is about the same age as baby Shife, he likes a little train that goes around a small oval track, I don't know who makes it. He also likes his remote controlled bulldozer. That's a great pic, he does look proud.

texlahoma said...

Almost forgot about the little electric "motorcycle" that's probably his favorite.

Mr. Shife said...

Thanks Texlahoma for the ideas. I will have to look for a train set. I am not sure if Desctructocon will play with it or destroy it but we can check it out.

Red said...

Cutest Baby to ever lose a rice cracker! On another note, you sound like you've got a case of the "shitties". I hope your day gets better. I can usually relate but that's dangerous territory for me. I need a regular paycheck so whenever I feel myself breaking out in a rash of "give-a-damns" I usually hit all the caffeine that I can to make myself even more annoying to those I have to work with. It lets me be me while having an 'out'. "It was the caffeine, sorry 'bout that!" Being hyped up on caffeine is the dietary equivalent of "just joking". People say stuff they mean but then push it off as "just joking" when they realize it really did get under your skin and they don't have the spine to back up their snarky comments. P-words!

Mr. Shife said...

Hey Red. Yep I am having the shitties. It mostly stems from a battle I was having with a doctor's office. It is over now so hopefully my mood will improve but I can always get hopped up on caffeine. Or maybe I can just watch a Jersey Shore marathon and eat a gallon of fudge. Mmmm. Fudge.

Crystal Posey said...

Leap Frog toys are fantastic. My kids knew their phonics by age three b/c of those toys. They have excellent videos too, for when he gets about 2.

Activity tables.
Push/pull walkers.
Engaging toys with lots of buttons, lights, and unfortunately noise (these types are great for development).
Cars and Blocks. Classic (The large cars without the tiny wheels. Of course you know this but this is my way of making sure you know that I know that too, and that I'm not suggesting some idiot toy for your kid. Eh.)

Shopping for the kids is SO much fun!

Mr. Shife said...

Excellent list Crystal - thank you. He has a few of those things already so I guess we are doing something right. Shopping for the kids is fun but the problem I have right now is knowing when to say no when I am at the toy store. And I knew you wouldn't suggest any idiot toys because you are an awesome mother. =)
A car with giant monster truck tires sounds superb.

Valerie said...

How about a new TV remote... or failing that a box of noisy things, buttons, bricks (soft), anything that clangs, that Baby Shife can rattle, shake and investigate to his little hearts content. At one year he doesn't need anything his Dad can play with ... wink.

Pssst... eating at TGI in the UK is pretty foul so no lies necessary.

Hey Shifey, I think you should get back to the glue where it's safe ...smiles.

Red said...

Oh F-u-u-u-u-u-u-dge.

Ananda girl said...

I'm with texlahoma... my grandson loves his electric motorcycle. But watch your toes and the fat basset will run.

Ms. Moon said...

Whatever makes a one-year old's parents happiest is what will make him happiest. So? A night away for just mama and daddy?

tina said...

dude...you should never mention "crabs" and your nether regions in the same sentence...hahaaa

Oooh present for 1 yr old...hmmm...my nephew turned 1 a year ago...he liked his little plastic honda car powered with Fred Flintstone energy (da feet) :)

Megan said...

Hmmm. I will ponder. That little guy just gets cuter all the time, don't he?

I never have a problem with Taco Bell... :)

Steph said...

One of those little motorized cars...........well that's what I'd want if I were one and could barely walk ;P

Travis Erwin said...

I think he would like a nice Drew Brees jersey.

WomanHonorThyself said...

sorry havent been around as much hun..Computer problems..oiy!..:) have a blessed weekend!

tiggysmum70 said...

Shife!! Your lil guy is soooooo cute! I love his smile! It is so infectious just like my lil guy's was back about 7 years ago!!

Hope things are going well.

Phats said...

Sorry I missed fill in the blank, I would have totally participated!

That is a great picture of the little one. Not a parent and I have no idea what you get a 1 yr old?!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

One-year-olds like fart noises done with your armpits, your mouth, or your mouth pressed up against their bellies (that's your best bet). The best thing is, fart noises are totally free. Okay, I admit. I'm an uncle, not a dad.

Crystal Posey said...

Saying no is the hardest part! And, yes, I am a pretty awesome mom. I'm glad you see it too.

Limon Partido said...

Shife, I'm late...but dinosaurs are usually a hit with the 1 year old crowd...and loved this post! It's ok to be mad...I haven't seen that side of you..so totally cool...

Just can't believe that sweet boy will be ONE!!! Sweet Bejeezus