Mr. Shife posted the landmark blog at 4:20 pm wearing his beloved “Did I Shave My Balls For This” t-shirt. The fan of Hasselhoff and midgets hit the enter button, and then rubbed the belly of his fat basset.
He exchanged a high-five with himself, then gave himself a pat on the back as he began checking out the blogs of his buddies. Many Internet notables sent him well-wishes and congratulations as news of his highlight surfaced on the World Wide Web.
The solo post gave Mr. Shife an opportunity to take an article written about a baseball player hitting his 500th home run and rewrite it to make him sound like he is a super cool dude. The blog had an estimated 273 words.
There were thousands of Mr. Shife backers in his imagination, and not one single camera flashed in his house during every keystroke leading up to Boise's designated blogger’s number 500 post.
In his first post, Mr. Shife wrote about the dog unemployment rate. He then wrote some more posts about his beloved basset but then realized his dog doesn’t do much but eat and sleep so his blog was going to be pretty boring unless he wrote about other fun things like an Ambushed Paddington or Random Acts of Shifeness.
"It's really cool right now to be a part of his blog," Mr. Shife’s second favorite Canadian Cher said. "Every time he posts I get goosebumps.”
*stands and throws confetti like material at mr.shife*
ReplyDelete*bursts bag of glitter over Shifely's head*
ReplyDeleteI'd prefer to be recognized as your S.A.S.S.Y., but rumour has it that you are no longer hiring.
ReplyDeleteOh MrShife how I have fake missed you and your blog.
Im alive, just having a some trouble getting my computer to obey the regulations of its restraining order
I am going to put todays newspaper in my safe!
ReplyDeleteAnd here come the rumors of steroids!
Congrats cork soaker
Lets see, about three years of blogging now, and over a 1000 posts on three different blogs.
ReplyDeleteSome of it funny, some of it to serious for others to understand it seems.
Sometimes my journey is a pain in the butt, but it is my journey so I must live with it.
Anyfuckingway, congrats on 500, I'm sure that at least fifty others noticed, ha ha ha.
We are such fucking specks of dust. That's the first I've seen of Cher for a while, I hope that she is doing well. I loved her mind fucks even though I seemed to have tested her thinker too much in other ways.
Yeah, congrats. My favorite posts always include the Bassett hound and the Hoff.
ReplyDeletecongratulations!
ReplyDeletei understand 500 makes you a lock for cooperstown.
500!!! WOW!
ReplyDeleteWow, you called me awesome and reached 500 all on the same day. Okay, I know this is serious. I'm going to start licking you from your toes. When I reach your...
ReplyDeletehead, you know I mean business.
XO
p.s. Mrs. Shife, no really, I mean his brain. Like you, I apprecate the collective matter stored there. Hope the pregnancy is going okay and life for both of you is enjoyable despite hard economic times. With love to all...Suz
Pretty amazing for a dumb, white guy. Congratulations and here's to the next 500 - better wash that t-shirt!
ReplyDeleteMrs. Shife should spank you 500 times to celebrate.
ReplyDeleteIs there such thing as a Mendoza line for blogging? If so, I'm way under it. Congrats anyways!
ReplyDeleteHappy 500!!!
ReplyDeleteHappy 500th Post!!
ReplyDeleteAre you getting nervous about the baby yet? You should!!! Sleep now because you'll need it. In fact, you should just stay in bed until the baby is born.
We love you, man!
Congrats on the 5ooth post and for yet again making me laugh.
ReplyDeleteha nice, congrats :) ya made me go check my stats, just wrote post #602...lotta stuff, lotta stuff i dont remember lol
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are blogging and I always look forward to reading your blog - here's to 500 more! Cheers.
Oh shit.. you mean I have 499 to read before I'm officially caught up...
ReplyDeleteAs usual I'm 499 days late and about $1000 dollars short.
Congrats on your stamina. I told you that blue pill would work.
ReplyDelete