- Humble apologies to you dear reader. It has been several Ambushed Paddingtons and a Dirty Sanchez since I last blogged. (And if you really want to know what a DS is then look it up but not at work) My anticipated return from the Black Hole of Suck was a little premature. I guess I had premature suckulation. Maybe there is a little blue pill for this. Ahhhh that new suck smell … you gotta love it.
On with the show.
- I don’t need the assistance of pharmaceuticals to envision that I might go insane in the immediate future.
- The beloved basset had to have 13 skin tags (the dog equivalent of warts) removed from his furvacious body. They electrocuted them off. Personally I think he looks like an ashtray because he has burn marks all over him.
- My favorite actor has a new movie coming out today. No The Hoff is not starring in Mitch Buchannon (FYI, the Hoff's character in Baywatch) and the Temple of Speedos . I am talking about Christian Bale. It is called “3:10 to
Yuma” and I think it is about a crazy Greyhound bus driver on his route to Yumafrom . Or it could be a kick-ass Western. Kalamazoo
- You would think I would have more to talk about since I have been absent for a little while now, but I really don’t. Maybe I am completely out of Confessions. Maybe I will have to change the name of my blog to Fabrications of a Dumb, White Guy.
- Three good arguments that Jesus was a woman: He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food, he kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it, and even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do!
- What do you think of this? A clever Tampon ad? Or why is there a pool in the middle of nowhere? Or maybe this lady has some nasty ass matter?
Well that’s all folks. Hopefully I will only be in the Blue Hole of Suck next week so I can post on a regular basis. Mrs. Shife suggested the Brown Hole of Suck but that just brings up some really bad imagery.
Have a great weekend. Get your drink on if you are into that type of behavior, and remember you are the tops.