- There is a band playing this week in my town called Battery. They are a Metallica tribute band, and the ad states: “These guys are so good that they have actually opened for Metallica … “
So the question I pose is how excited would you be to see a tribute band play before the actual band? Is that like your girlfriend using her favorite BOB (battery-operated boyfriend) before you step up to the plate? Or maybe she uses you first, and then finishes off with BOB? Ouch.
Maybe it is just me but I would rather not see a tribute band open for the real deal.
- Tomorrow is a sad day as the season finale of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” airs. I just started watching the show this summer and it is hilarious. It has three qualities I always look for in programming: Politically incorrect, crude, and awesome.
- When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this.
On your way home from work stop at your pharmacy, go to the thermometer section, and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand.
When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer. Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.
Now the fun part begins. Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice that in small print there is a statement, "Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested.”
Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in the Rectal Thermometer quality control at Johnson & Johnson."
- I am ready for some football. And in case you care, my teams are the University of Idaho Vandals and the Arizona Cardinals.
- Make your next trip to the grocery store a little more exciting. When you check out say this to the cashier, "I like your style" and shoot them double-barreled fingers.
- I am Pro-Shife and I vote.