Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Game On

After a long look in the mirror, I decided that I really need to get an effin’ tan. Man, I am pale.
OK. Just kidding. Well I am pale, but that is not what I decided after looking in the mirror. I was just being figurative.
Maybe I should just get on with it.
First of all, I am not completely mental and the Jehovah’s Witnesses did not take me away nor did I sign up for one of their really intensive weekends of skull humping.
I guess most of you don’t know my religious views but for the most part I am not a big fan of organized religion. I like the message just not the messengers. George Carlin can sum up religion way better than I can but there is no need to worry about me hopping on Jerry Falwell’s fun bus.
Secondly, thank you very much for your advice and inspiring words because it really did help. I went and saw the mental chiropractor and everything got aligned and adjusted so I am feeling much better. I think some of you are going to think that a mental chiropractor is my cute way of saying a shrink, but I was just trying to be funny.
Actually, my shrink has four legs and a very hairy back. The fat basset is an excellent listener and always gives good advice. Alright, fine, I do have a shrink but she is not licensed and she signed up for it when she said “I Do.”
Mrs. Shife and I had a nice long talk over the weekend about making our life more interesting and fulfilling. And having children is not the answer. I would love to have a kid someday, but what the world needs right now is for me to get back in the game and start making life happen instead of waiting for it to happen.
So my friends I take a pledge today to tell you that this is my life and I am ready to rock. Didn’t Bon Jovi have a song called “My Life?” Nope. It is called “It’s My Life.” Close enough. I can use that as my official philosophy song. I feel like I am announcing my candidacy for office.
No more putting off things until tomorrow and no more being afraid to do something because it is out of my comfort zone.
Life is indeed too short for regrets.
Finally, I just want to thank you all again, but one person said something that really resonated with me. The Blonde said, "What do you think you could accomplish in life, if you knew you couldn't fail?" She said her Dad used to say that to her, and that is how she approaches life. Well her Dad was a very wise man and that is not a bad way to look at things.

Peace out blogging nation and may all your ups and downs be between the sheets.

31 comments:

angel, jr. said...

I'm glad that your life is back on track.
It's never too early to have a mid-life crisis. It's part of testosterone cycle. I'm planning to do research once all this testing is over, about our own male version of PMS and hormone cycles.
It's good to have regular sex, thereby cleansing the body of hormonal build-up.
And it's also good to have a basset hound to listen to your gripes.
A sports car doesn't hurt either.

Laurie (aka buggy) said...

Bon Jovi rocks, at whatever age. :)

The Reverend Jon Boles said...

I'm more in Doug Stanhope land, which means I'm basically bored already at a young age.

Phats said...

Hey glad to hear all things in shifeworld are looking up! Bon Jovi, good tunes man good tunes.

I am glad you weren't abducted by Jehovah’s Witnesses or the amish they can both be down right scary

Jay said...

Wow, you're all gung-ho! What the hell does gung-ho really mean? Will you be able to give us the answers now that you're all guru and shit?

yellowdog granny said...

why do i see you joining the peace corps?..

Denise said...

Way to go Idaho! (I've seen Toy Story too many times.)

A good life doesn't just happen...you have to make it happen. Best of luck to you!

meghansdiscontent said...

Go get 'em, Shife!

Jon said...

I didn't get the chance to do my usual commenting routine on Monday, but I can identify with you on it. Good luck to you!

the_mrs said...

You go, boy. =)

Katina Cloud said...

I love your blog Shife. You seem to be a good person and probably would be a blast to hang out with. I hope you find what it is to make your life more fulfilling!!

PS: I'm loving the fact I can tell Roxie anything and she doesn't judge me =)

Johnson said...

When you're too old to listen to Bon Jovi, that's when you should be having your mid-life crisis. It sounds like this is the end of Confessions of a dumb, white guy blog. Say it aint so Shife. Say it aint so, although I wish you the best in whatever you end up doing to make your life more fulfilling.

Danny Haszard said...

Up close and personal Jehovah's Witnesses can be wolves in sheep's clothing.

Think about this-When the devil comes knocking on your door he may not have the 'dark goth look'.They could be smartly dressed and wielding the Christian Bible.

I have Jehovah's Witnesses family in the usa who practice the Watchtower JW enforced ritual shunning that i have not seen or heard from in 15 years.

The central CORE dogma of the Watchtower is Jesus second coming (invisibly) in 1914 and is a lie.Jehovah's Witnesses are a spin-off of the man made Millerite movement of 1840.

A destructive cult of false teachings, that frequently result in spiritual and psychological abuse, as well as needless deaths (bogus blood transfusion ban).

Yes,you can 'check out anytime you want but you can never leave',because they can and will hold your family hostage.

The world has the Internet now,and there are tens of thousands of pages up from disgruntled ex-Jehovah's Witnesses like myself who have been abused by the Watchtower cult.

Jehovah's Witnesses are often a mouth that prays a hand that kills.The Watchtower is a truly Orwellian world.
----
Danny Haszard former Jehovah's Witness X 33 years and 3rd generation www.dannyhaszard.com

white dade said...
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mrshife said...
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leo myshkin said...

as ty webb said to danny noonan:

"be the ball"

Molly said...

I want to jump on your bandwagon shife.

Will you be my life coach? ;)

or the very least tell me where your buying the good shit.

white dade said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ashburnite said...

Apparently the asshat that is posting comments on all of our blogs finally made it into the 5th grade and has learned how to link our blog addresses to the fake username they put in. I think some people have WAY too much time on their hands.

mrshife said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
white dade said...
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mrshife said...

Ashburnite -- I guess you are right. I imagine the real comments from White Dade would include his photo.

Ashburnite said...

Shife- I think Nicole & Eric are going to do something about this guy. I got his IP off statcounter, so hopefully those two computer geniuses can do something.

The Phoenix said...

My basset isn't as good of a listener, but she does howl a lot.

So now what...are you going to be jumping out of an airplane or something very soon?

the duck said...

this post sounds like a sign off post. you're not quitting blogging to pursue other goals are you?

mrshife said...

For those of you concerned that I am signing off, that is not the case. I am just turning over a new leaf but I will continue to blog.

Blonde Vigilante said...

Good for you. Sometimes I feel like I live in a constant state of procrastination. I think I need to talk to your Basset.

Anonymous said...

rock on matt!!
I wish you no fear :)
mona

nicole said...

Wow, the Blonde's wisdom is really hitting me too! I'm going to have to mull that one over for awhile.

And it cracks me up that Ash believes I'm some kind of computing super genius. That's ALL Eric!

Design Goddess said...

Good luck in your quest for life!

2 JW's came to my door once when I was about 9, all I can remember was that the one was named "Cinnamon" and that I thought they were whacked! I wonder how they felt coming into the "Holy corner" in the first place?

[I lived right by my Catholic church, school, rectory (where the priests lived) and convent. Talk about not getting away with anything!]

Scottish Toodler said...

Rockin out to the Bon Jovi post!!!