Monday, March 27, 2006

It’s not TV. It’s HBO.

And it is on 193 times a month.
Here is my problem. I had a few days off last week and watched more TV than I usually do.
And I swear “I, Robot” was on every day.
And I swear it was on at least 17 times.
Granted I have 8 HBO stations which might explain the high frequency of this film being on my television. But you get the point that I got plenty of opportunities to see Will Smith kick robot ass.
So I am in the cozy confines of my sweat pants and have the fat basset by my side as we prepare for another round of channel surfing to help pass the time until something more interesting comes along. I flipped through the 800 channels in a matter of seconds. For some reason, men can process the on screen television guide like nobody’s business but we can’t lift up the toilet seat. I guess we are just cursed. After my first lap I saw that there are no re-runs of “Knight Rider” being aired so “I, Robot” was on and it was deemed by the basset as a worthy companion. I turned it on and it was about halfway over. I had seen it before so I wasn’t lost but I still wanted to see the movie in its entirety. I made a mental note to try and catch the movie again after it was over.
And now repeat that paragraph about 15 more times over 4 days.
I know that makes me sound like the Commander of the Slug Army but I did other things during the day. However, when I came back to watch some TV “I, Robot” was on and I was at the same part every damn time.
I own this movie on DVD and I could have easily put it in my DVD player and watched it.
But fuck that. It is on like Donkey Kong with me and HBO. It is a game between me and the programmers at that station now. They know when I am sleeping, they know when I am awake and they know how to offer alternative programming to lure me away from watching a complete viewing of “I, Robot.”
I will be victorious in my quest.
Or I might just let people pelt me with rotten fruit and call me a loser.

29 comments:

the duck said...

First comment! w00t! I have nothing to add except that I still haven't seen I Robot, and would like to, so there.

Pollyanna said...

How, exactly, does a fat Basset make it known that he deems a movie worthy? Does he attempt to roll over in sheer delight? Or does he simply lift his Deputy Dog head off the pillow and give an unceremonious nod?

Inquiring minds, Shife...

the duck said...

This is just a guess but I think his little pinkie shows when he truly approves of something. Shife can give us an official ruling of this I'm sure.

mrshife said...

No lipstick sighting.
He just gives me a look. If you have ever owned a basset then you know what the look is.

The Phoenix said...

Have you ever been evaluated for OCD?

nicole said...

HA! "I, Robot???" Like the movie came out last week or something.

I remember the days when I was an avid HBO watcher (back when there was only ONE channel). They'd play the same, stale movie 12 times a day. Glad to see nothing's changed. ;)

White Dade said...

HBO always has that one movie that seems to always be on. I guess right now it is I-Robot. But that is actually how I got to like "eyes Wide Shut" After the 19th time, its actually pretty good.

The Reverend Jon Boles said...

I kind of like the irony of repeat showing of "I,Robot" on the television. Call me crass, but it's seemingly appropriate.

That being said, I pulled a repeat viewing of "Vendetta" today, Shifey. It held up well for the second round, and it's still a colossal flick in my book.

The Reverend Jon Boles said...

Sigh.

*showings.

Goddamnit.

Super Woman said...

8 channels of HBO sounds awesome, until you realize it's the same 5 movies again, and again and again.

Rocky (Racquel) said...

Wow, so all these years it has been the programmers at HBO deciding whether I'm on the naughty or nice list at Christmas?

Atalanta said...

Nineteen rounds of Eyes Wide Shut? It was hard enough through the first time...

'I Robot' was pretty good, for a movie 'loosely suggested' by the actual book, which i have yet to read. I was entertained. Clearly you were too :)

angel, jr. said...

I've never watched "I,Robot".

Phats said...

Hmm I saw Baywatch on the other night on Spike tv at 2am. Some good hoff moments for ya but no knight rider.

I have never seen I Robot

missy said...

I haven't seen I Robot but thought about getting it for my PSP. As I haven't had cable TV for at least 6 years, I didn't realise that there are so many HBO channels now? There used to be only one?

Jay said...

I hope you watched the scene where he's nekkid in the shower over and over. I certainly do.

Jon said...

We don't get HBO, but we do get Encore. And they've been doing the same thing with "Kill Bill 1 & 2" lately.
As for the rotten fruit pelting, remember I work in produce. It can be arranged.

Dirk the Feeble said...

Have you ever watched the last half of "I, Robot" while being pelted by fruit and called a loser . . . . on WEED, man?

coloradohurricane said...

I actually saw I Robot twice in th theatre- I stuck around after the first time and figured I'd watch it again.

T. Leach said...

Yeah, this is all well and good, but what about your red-headed stepson Turf Toe? Just sayin.

Johnson said...

Last year when I had Starz, during the months of January, February and March, I didn't feel complete unless I had seen at least two of the following: Glory, Tombstone or Dawn of the Dead.

Father of 3 said...

Is it me or is Miss Congeniality on every damned second of every day on HBO??

lilly said...

I think all movie channels are in on some evil plan to make us go insane by playing the same movies back to back for weeks at a time...

d34dpuppy said...

i think the number of showings r directly proportional to the amount of money they had to pay for it

DaMasta said...

I can only see I, Robot so many times. I like the beginning, but by the end.. ugh.. it's like ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN ROBOTS, ALREADY!

leo myshkin said...

bruce springsteen had it figured out years ago "57 channels and nothing to watch"

Tina said...

I'm a sucker for repeats on cable, hubby jus laughs and says dont you have that on DVD...yup...but I dont have to find it and put it in player, that means I have a plan....I like being lazy and spontaneous LOL So cable...give me another hit!

Scottish Toodler said...

Ah, grasshopper, you did not learn the lesson of the tao that I Robot was offering you, and alas, are doomed to repeat it...

Luke said...

I have soooooo experienced the whole "watching part of a movie" thing on TV.