Last Saturday I had the wonderful pleasure of running 7 miles for my half-marathon training. It was a cold, blistery day but the course was nice as it took us along the Greenbelt, which links over 850 acres of parks and natural areas along the Boise River. We live in a pretty friendly town and everyone says hello and good morning as you pass each other on the course.
After about mile 6, I am feeling good. I am saying hi to everyone, there is a spring in my step, and I am thinking how cool I am. (Disclaimer: The following sentences are a dramatic re-creation of my stream of consciousness while I was running.) I just pulled off an awesome surprise party for Mrs. Shife which makes me the best husband ever and life is pretty good since our families are in town. We are going to have a great weekend. What are we going to do? I want to go to the movies. I can’t wait to see V for Vendetta. It is going to be A for Awesome. Oh here comes another jogger – should I wave and say hello or should I just wave? Maybe I should just say good morning? I think I will say good morning and wave. Yeah, I have not done that yet. Or I could say good morning and give thumbs up. Now that would be impressive. But is it too much? OK, here he comes. “Good morning” and a wave and OH NO, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I DID NOT JUST TRIP AND FALL. Holy shit this is embarrassing. Are you kidding me? I did not just trip and fall while I was saying good morning to a fellow jogger. Oh but I did, and you have the scuffed knees and hands to prove it.
I get up quickly and assure the fellow jogger that I am OK.
And I laugh at myself as I finish my run.
The first question Mrs. Shife asks me when I tell her the story is "What was she wearing?"
I just figure someone up above was just giving me a friendly reminder that maybe I should not be so full of myself and I needed a reality check.
Either that or I am just a dork.
After about mile 6, I am feeling good. I am saying hi to everyone, there is a spring in my step, and I am thinking how cool I am. (Disclaimer: The following sentences are a dramatic re-creation of my stream of consciousness while I was running.) I just pulled off an awesome surprise party for Mrs. Shife which makes me the best husband ever and life is pretty good since our families are in town. We are going to have a great weekend. What are we going to do? I want to go to the movies. I can’t wait to see V for Vendetta. It is going to be A for Awesome. Oh here comes another jogger – should I wave and say hello or should I just wave? Maybe I should just say good morning? I think I will say good morning and wave. Yeah, I have not done that yet. Or I could say good morning and give thumbs up. Now that would be impressive. But is it too much? OK, here he comes. “Good morning” and a wave and OH NO, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I DID NOT JUST TRIP AND FALL. Holy shit this is embarrassing. Are you kidding me? I did not just trip and fall while I was saying good morning to a fellow jogger. Oh but I did, and you have the scuffed knees and hands to prove it.
I get up quickly and assure the fellow jogger that I am OK.
And I laugh at myself as I finish my run.
The first question Mrs. Shife asks me when I tell her the story is "What was she wearing?"
I just figure someone up above was just giving me a friendly reminder that maybe I should not be so full of myself and I needed a reality check.
Either that or I am just a dork.
Comments
What was she wearing, anyway?
Oh, and the Ohio State game was so sad. I cannot believe they lost!
1) Bikini jogger-- she is perfect. nothing on her body jiggles. She runs in a bikini.
2) Bouncing jogger-- big breasticles and doesnt wear a bra when she runs. I don't know how she doesn't knock herself out.
BTW, I think you are the greatest husband ever. If you are ever in the market for a MrsShifeII, I am available.
Breasticles.. is that a technical term? :P
Good luck with the half marathon, hopefully you'll stay on your feet
I need to get back into running. I love it.
Nicely written story, dude. I can almost feel the scuffs on my hands!
i haven't fell for such a long time... i forget how that feels like... i hope you didn't scratch anything essential...
v for vendetta was good.. i liked it alot.. not worth seeing on Imax though.. not as action packed as i thought it would be...
I'll ask one more time: What was she wearing?