How I Met Mrs. Shife

In a county far, far away it was the 1997 spring semester at the University of Idaho. Mr. Shife was set to graduate in 2 months and then depart to Nashville, TN to begin film school. He had just ended a relationship with a girl and was ready to enjoy his last 60 days on campus. Mr. Shife's fraternity had a huge party at the end of the semester called the Pirate's Dance. The house got decorated like a pirate ship, there was an awesome seafood dinner and of course lots of boozing. Well since this was going to be my last hurrah at the house I wanted an awesome date. I contacted my girl friends at a sorority and put in a request -- I want a date that is 21, has no boyfriend and just wants to have fun. The girls sprung into action and before I could say Chewbacca likes to chug cock they informed me that they had the perfect girl for me. So I was set. Well fast forward a week and I was partying at my fraternity with some of the girls who set me up. It was a polyester party and everyone was in some sort of '70s gear. My outfit consisted of an outrageously ugly shirt with the sleeves cut off and a fake leather vest and some really nice bell bottoms. The girls I was with decided some make-up would really tie my outfit together so I got some blush, lipstick, eye liner, etc. put on by these good samaritans. So I am all done up looking like a cross-dressing polyester hooker and did I mention I am pretty hammered as well. The girls have to run back to their sorority so I decide to tag along and as I am waiting in their entryway along comes my date. She walks in not paying much attention to the weirdo on the bench, but my girl friends come get me at the same time and that is when I met Mrs. Shife. I was dressed up like a gay disco queen and she was in sweats and a sweatshirt because she has just gotten back from cleaning a house. There was no spark or love at first sight, just an introduction. Fast forward a month and I pick up Mrs. Shife for my dance and this time we are both dressed more appropriately. And we went out to a bar with some friends to grab a few drinks before the dance started and we just clicked. I fought it as long as I could because I knew I was leaving to go to film school, but Mrs. Shife is irresistible and that day was the beginning of our courtship. I decided I would regret not finding out if this was the love of my life and put film school on hold and came back to school at Idaho to get another degree while Mrs. Shife finished up her degree. We got engaged in March 1999 at my sister's wedding, and then we got married in September 2004. That's right we waited 5 years, but we both march to a different beat and we waited until we were ready.
So that's how I met the most wonderful girl in the world.